高考英语读后续写:示例与写作 训练5(含解析)
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1、读后续写示例与写作训练5【写作示例】【原文呈现】阅读下面短文,根据所给情节进行续写,使之构成一个完整的故事。Steve, a twelve-year-old boy withparents, was about to be lost forever, by the U.S. education system., he could read, yet, in spite of his reading skills, Steve was failing. He had been failing since first grade, as he was passed on from grade to
2、 grade. Steve was a big boy, looking more like a teenager than a twelve year old, yet, Steve went unnoticed. until Miss White. Miss White was a smiling, young, beautiful teacher. For the first time in Steves young life, he couldnt take his eyes off his teacher; yet, still he failed. He never did his
3、 homework, and he was always in trouble with Miss White. In the middle of the first semester of school, the entire seventh grade was tested for basic skills. Steve hurried through his tests, and continued to dream of other things. His heart was not in school, but in the woods, where he often escaped
4、 alone, trying to shut out the sights, sounds and smells of his alcoholic home. One day, Miss Whites impatient voice broke into his. “Steve!” Startled, he turned to look at her. “Pay attention!”Steve locked his gaze on Miss White with adolescent, as she began to go over the test results for the seve
5、nth grade. “You all did pretty well,” she told the class, “except for one boy, and it breaks my heart to tell you this, but.” She hesitated, pinning Steve to his seat with a sharp stare, her eyes searching his face. “.The smartest boy in the seventh grade is failing my class!”She just stared at Stev
6、e, as the classaround for a good look. Steve dropped his eyes and carefully examined his fingertips. “Steve! Please! I care about you!” Miss White reminded Steve with a louder voice. Wow! Suddenly, Steve got it! Someone cared about him? Someone, totally unattainable and perfect, CARED ABOUT HIM?!注意:
7、1. 所续写短文的词数应为150左右;2. 应使用5个以上短文标有下划线的关键词语;3. 续写部分分为两段,每段的开头语已为你写好;4. 续写完成后,请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词。Paragraph 1:Steve went home from school, thoughtful, that afternoon._Paragraph 2: Miss White, immediately, gave a quiz on the weekend homework._【思维路径】核心内容 文本主要内容为:12岁的男孩Steve有一对酗酒的父母,受家庭环境影响,他从来不做作业,从一年级开始每次考试
8、都不合格,直到他遇到了Miss White。在七年级期中考试中,全班都考得很好,只有Steve一人没有通过考试,Miss White称Steve为全班最聪明的男孩并告诉他她一直在关心他,这激起了一个长久以来一直被忽视的小男孩的勇气和决心。写作思路(1)明确故事人物关系(characters)。故事中主要人物为12岁的叛逆男孩Steve,他酗酒的父母parents和一直关心和激励他的老师Miss White。(2)理清故事主要事件(events)。Steve有一对酗酒的父母;Steve从来不做作业,考试每次都不合格;Steve遇到了Miss White;全班参加了七年级的期中测试;Steve一人
9、没通过考试;Miss White通过话语激励他使他发生了改变。(3)根据已知人物、事件及续写段落首句预测故事发展(development)。故事总体的发展应该是Steve回到家后开始认真地做他的周末作业,Miss White通过测试同学们对周末作业的完成情况来及时表扬和证明Steve是一个可塑之才,从而彻底改变Steve的学习态度及以后的人生方向。续写第一段:根据第二段开头句子的提示,该段续写内容最有可能与周末作业相关。所以Steve回到家后,可能是转变他以前的做法,开始认真地做自己的回家作业,也可能是仍旧把作业放一边,自己去树林里玩等。续写第二段:Miss White马上针对学生的周末作业做
10、了一个小测试,发展情节可能是Steve认真完成并通过了测试使得所有人刮目相看,也可能是他仍旧没有通过测试让Miss White失望等。(4)结合下划线词罗列写作要点(points)。结合下划线词和文本内容,展开尽可能丰富的想象,罗列出尽可能多的故事发展情节。例如,第一段可以通过问以下问题来获取写作要点“What did Steve think? What did he do after he went home? Did he make a change or still remain the same?等”第二段可以问以下问题来获取写作要点:“What did Steve behave in
11、 the test? What score did he get? How did Miss White respond to the result?等”参考范文Steve went home from school, thoughtful, that afternoon. Walking into the house, he took one look around and then quickly, gathered up his camping gear, a jar of peanut butter, a loaf of bread, a bottle of water, and th
12、is time.his schoolbooks. Grim faced and, he headed for the woods. Steve studied hard in the woods and finished all the homework for the weekend. Miss White, immediately, gave a quiz on the weekend homework. Steve hurried through the test, and was the first to hand in his paper. With a look of surpri
13、se, Miss White took his paper. Obviously puzzled, she began to look it over. Steve walked back to his desk, his heart pounding within his chest. Miss Whites face was in total shock! She glanced up at Steve down and up. Suddenly, her face broke into a radiant smile. The smartest boy had just passed h
14、is first test! A great change took place within the heart of one boy, all because of one teacher, who cared.(除给定词外,165 words)范文解析 范文围绕文章的内容进行了合情合理的拓展。为了使文章显得更加有意义,范文中突出描写了Steve因原文中Miss White给予的关注而做出了改变。因此第一段写了Steve回到家后收拾了自己的生活必需品去他自己最喜爱的树林里,开始认真地写他的周末作业了。第二段写了Miss White针对这个周末作业进行了一个小测试,在测试中,Steve表现异
15、常得好并顺利通过了测试。最后一句是根据原文和范文的内容进行的总结,并点出了全文的主题,引发读者思考。提炼归纳 1. 合理拓展情节读后续写首先要读通给定文本,把握故事的人物和事件。在此基础上根据每段续写开头的提示对故事的发展作出合情合理又合乎逻辑的预测。为了将预测过程显性化,可以通过设问的方式,将预测重点以问题的方式显示出来,以利后续写作时的信息整理和语言组织。在开始写范文前,我们首先用6个问题来构思整个文章的发展。通过对这6个问题的可能回答的排列组合,挑选出最符合逻辑的情节发展。实际上,原文在结尾处就已经暗示了接下来情节发展的可能性,最有可能的就是Steve因为老师的话和关心而做出了改变。因此
16、,范文就顺藤摸瓜,描写了Steve彻底改变,让老师和同学刮目相看,从而突出了全文的主题。2. 紧密联系原文内容续写是在原文内容的基础上进一步对接下来发展情节的预测和描写。因此,续写的内容必须与原文紧密相关。可以在情节上承接原文,也可以用特定的细节,如人物,地点,事件等来呼应原文。在本范文中就有很多细节与原文相呼应,如原文中写到为了逃避自己酒气熏天,乱糟糟的屋子,Steve总是喜欢一个人在树林里(woods)闲逛或者思考。因此在范文中Steve完成周末作业的地点我们也选择了他最喜欢的小树林。再例如范文中的the smartest boy也是呼应了原文中Miss White对Steve的描述。3.
17、 有效运用连接手段在具体的写作过程中我们要对罗列的要点进行筛选和整合,还要考虑写作要点之间连接手段(connectives)的有效运用,例如范文中我们用了walking into the house来表示地点的转换,用with a look of surprise来表明Steve的表现给老师带来的吃惊。这些连接语的使用可以使文本更加紧凑连贯。【写作演练】1.阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。续写的词数应为150左右。The little boyA little boy selling magazines for school walked up to a
18、 house that people rarely visited. The house was very old and shabby and the owner hardly ever came out. When he did come out, he would not say hello to his neighbors or passers-by but simply just glare at them.The boy knocked on the door and waited, sweating from fear of the old man. The boys paren
19、ts told him to stay away from the house, and a lot of the other neighborhood children were told the same thing from their parents.Dust found the boy lingering on and hesitating what to do. As he was ready to walk away, the door slowly opened. “What do you want?” the old man said impatiently. The lit
20、tle boy was very afraid but he had a quota(份额) to meet for school with selling the magazines. So he got up the courage and said, “Uh, sir, I am selling these magazines and uh, I was wondering if you would like to buy one from me.”The old man just stared at the boy without a word. The boy could see i
21、nside the old mans house and saw that he had dog figurines(小雕像) on the fireplace mantle. “Do you collect dogs?” The little boy asked. “Yes, I have many collections in my house. They are my family here and they are all I have.” The boy then felt sorry for the man, as it seemed that he was a very lone
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